In his May 19 column, Radio World contributor Al Peterson viewed the recent NAB convention through the eyes of his Las Vegas alter ego, Shecky Peterson.
Among his lounge-act observations was the following contribution to industry reportage on digital radio.
Okay, it’s getting late, so it’s just about time to send you nice folks home with a song.
(Piano player touches gentle Bb7 chord in anticipation, Shecky waves him off)
No, not tonight, Tom. Tonight, we’re going disco!
(Sound guy starts playing karaoke CD of “YMCA” by the Village People)
I thought this year, now that IBOC and HD and all that other stuff is the Big Thing everybody’s talking about, we’re gonna send you folks home dancing! So everybody get up and follow me! I’ll teach you the special arm moves, so here we go!
Young man – you’ve been waiting for years, now the … Daw-ning – of IBOC draws near, you can… Blow out – what remains of your ears at un-god-ly vol-ume le-vels.
Save up – for a new stereo cuz the… Old one – will be worthless you know, when your… Station – puts out ones and ze-roes You can chuck it in the land-fill,
CHORUS: (Don’t forget the special arm moves)
So get rea-dy for: I-B-O-C! It’s fun to lis-ten to I-B-O-C! It has sidebands that buzz, there’s no multipath fight, It’s just tough to get AM late at night-.
So buy your tu-ner for: I-B-O-C! It’s fun to listen to I-B-O-C! It joins AM and FM; XM, Sirius too, You’ll have receivers coming out the wa-zoo,
(Audience of elderly gamblers dancing, then all topple over each other in a sweaty heap, gasping for breath)
Thank you, thank you, yer a wunnerful audience. Tell your friends about the 10 o’clock show.